Name: Alex Rogan

Occupation: None

Family: Jane Rogan (Mother), Louis Rogan (Brother)

Allies: Maggie Gordon, Grig, the Rylan Star League, Centauri, Beta, Residents of the Starlight trailer park

Enemies: Xur and the Ko’dan Armada, Lord Kril

Weapon of Choice: Gunstar Starfighter (with special weapon Death Blossom)

Body Count: Unknown

Memorable Quote: “Teriffic. I’m about to get killed a million miles from nowhere with a gung-ho iguana who tells me to relax”

See Alex in Action:

This week on Musical Montage we’re highlighting a very special scene from the 80′s “classic” Teen Witch.  Teen Witch follows the misadventures of 16 year old Louise Miller, who discovers that she’s the reincarnated witch and her powers will soon begin to develop.  Louise uses her new powers to do a variety of things including getting revenge on the evil cheerleaders at her school and getting the hottest guy in school to fall in love with her but her greatest use of magic is to help her nerdy friend Polly introduce herself to the object of her affection by mind controlling her into engaging him in a rap battle.  It’s either the greatest or worst thing to ever happen to rap and you can check out the whole amazing scene below.

A classic of the 80′s ninja genre, Pray for Death stars Sho Kosugi as a mild mannered Japanese business man, Akira Saito, who has a secret past as a master of ninjitsu.  He moves his family to America at his wife’s behest and they buy a restaurant in a horrible section of the New Orleans looking city they move to.  Unknown to the family, a criminal gang has been hiding a cache of stolen diamonds in the abandoned cigar store connected to the restaurant but they go missing and a things quickly spiral out of control until Akira is forced to unleash his full ninja arsenal against the criminals.  It’s super cheesy in the best way possible and you can watch the whole movie, thanks to YouTube and whatever studio that has the rights to Pray for Death not caring.

Something special for this week’s Musical Montage as we’re highlighting some choice musical scenes from the CBS Schoolbreak Special, Ace Hits the Big Time from 1984.  The movie, based on a children’s novel of the same name, follows Horace “Ace” Hobart as he starts the school year at his new school, Manhattan’s Kennedy High.  He wears an eye patch for some reason and becomes of interest to the local gang of toughs, The Falcons.  As you’ll see in one of the clips below, The Falcons are perhaps the most fabulous and flamboyant gang in movie history, making even the Sharks and Jets of West Side Story look like the Bloods and Crips.  It is easily one of the most hilariously bad things you will ever see so don’t waste any more time and check out the clips below.

Ace is “threatened” by The Falcons

The big finale of the movie

Corman’ World: Exploits of a Hollywood Rebel is an upcoming documentary taking a look back at the career of Roger Corman, the legendary director/producer of such B-movie classics as Death Race 2000, Pirahna, Forbidden World, Deathstalker, Caged Heat and Chopping Mall, just to name a few. Despite making what are ostensibly cheesy horror and sci fi movies, Corman had a huge influence on Hollywood and the documentary interviews some of the future stars that got their start with a Corman movie like Robert De Niro, Jack Nicholson, Ron Howard and Pam Grier as well as fans like Eli Roth.  I’m really interested to see and hear some of the stories behind some of Corman’s classics.  The movie is out in limited release in December and probably on DVD and Netflix some time afterwards.  Check out the trailer below.

Back to our regular Musical Montage after last month’s Disney marathon and this week we’re taking a look at the other 80′s classic featuring fighter jet pilots, Iron Eagle.  Iron Eagle is a perfect movie for Musical Montage because the main theme, “Iron Eagle (Never Say Die)” by King Kobra features Lou Gossett Jr and is the band training to be fighter pilots and the soundtrack is also a key plot point as our hero, Doug Masters, is infintely more accurate in his jet when he’s listening to his cassette player.  The soundtrack features the one song from Queen’s “A Kind of Magic” not featured in Highlander (One Vision) as well as tons of cheesy 80′s hair metal and some classic rock as well.  Check it all out below.

“Iron Eagle (Never Say Die)” by King Kobra

“One Vision” by Queen

“Old Enough to Rock & Roll” by Rainey

“Road of the Gypsy” by Adrenalin

“Eyes of the World” by Eric Martin

“Gimme Some Lovin’” by The Spencer Davis Group

The remakes of old television shows continues into 2012 with a remake of the Johnny Depp/Richard Grieco 80′s “classic”, 21 Jump Street.  The new movie follows Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum as former high school enemies who become friends while in the police academy, with Hill helping Tatum with the written exams while Tatum helps Hill with the physical tests.  The guys graduate but are relegated to bicycle patrol in a park.  After almost making a great drug bust, the pair are transferred to the recently reinstated Jump Street undercover division and sent to the local high school to pose as students and figure out where a new synthetic drug is coming from.  Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum look like they might be funny together but the supporting cast looks like it might make it worth watching including Rob Riggle, Ice Cube and Ron Fucking Swanson himself, Nick Offerman.  It’s been a while since there’s been a great action/comedy (last one was probably Hot Fuzz) and while this one doesn’t look great, it seems like it could be funny.  Check out the red band trailer below and the movie is out next March.

Name: Cole (last name unknown)

Occupation: Army Veteran/Ninja

Family: None

Allies: Mary Ann and Frank Landers, Komori

Enemies: Charles Venarius and his goons, Hasegawa

Weapon(s) of Choice: Ninjitsu, throwing stars, katana

Body Count: unknown

Memorable Quote: “My friend, a ninja doesn’t kill. He eliminates and only for defensive purposes”

See Cole in Action:

On this day in 1967, a little film production company named Cannon was incorporated that eventually became one of the greatest sources for ridiculous 80′s action movies and helped launch the careers of both Chuck Norris and Jean Claude Van Damme and produced some of Sly Stallone’s B classics.  The studio was eventually absorbed by MGM but their cultural impact, especially with action fans, will always be felt.  Here’s our pick for the ten best films from the Cannon catalog.

10. Kickboxer

Kicking things off with Van Damme’s follow up to Bloodsport, Kickboxer follows Kurt Sloane (Van Damme) as he journeys to Thailand with his brother Eric, who is competing in a brutal fighting tournament.  Eric faces off against the undefeated champion, Tong Po, and is paralyzed from Tong Po’s brutal assault.  Kurt vows to get revenge and, after training with master Xian Chow and ultimately faces Tong Po in a brutal kickboxing match.  Kickboxer is a fun movie by itself but it pales into comparison to Bloodsport (which we’ll get to later in the list) and basically goes through the same exact plot beats.  Kickboxer does have one thing over Bloodsport however and that is Van Damme busting a move and then busting some skulls.

9. Missing in Action

Cannon would ultimately get Stallone inducted into their flock but they missed out on Stallone’s defining action role, John Rambo.  To remedy this, Cannon decided to create their own Vietnam POW turned one man army with Colonel James Braddock, played by Chuck Norris.  Braddock gets a similiar mission to Rambo in First Blood Part II in that he’s sent into Vietnam to uncover evidence of any American POWs and, upon finding said evidence, is betrayed by an asshole bureaucrat.  Braddock then takes it upon himself to blow up a large chunk of Vietnam and rescue the hostages.  As Rambo knock offs go, you can do a whole lot worse than the Missing in Action series.

8. Enter the Ninja

One subject that Cannon loved to explore in their films was white, American military men becoming ninjas.  Enter the Ninja has become overshadowed by it cousin the American Ninja series but it’s just as wonderfully ridiculous.  Franco Nero (rocking a sweet stache) plays Cole, an army veteran who trains with a secret ninja clan and becomes a master of ninjitsu.  Cole goes to the Phillipines to visit an old army buddy and gets involved in a plot by an evil CEO, who wants to steal Cole’s friend’s land because there’s a massive oil deposit under it.  The highlight of the movie is easily the end where Cole uses all of his ninja skills to take down the evil Charles Venarius and his goons.  Venarius himself as one of the most hilarious and greatest death scenes ever on film.

7. The Delta Force

Chuck Norris and Lee Marvin, a team no terrorist can even hope to survive. When a group of Lebanese terrorists hijack a plane and force it to fly to Beirut, The Delta Force is called in to take them down and rescue the hostages.  The movie takes a little while to get going but once it does, it doesn’t stop until Chuck Norris uses a dirtbike loaded with missiles to blow up every single terorrist.  That’s just one instance of Chuck’s bad assness in The Delta Force.  To cap it off, The Delta Force also has one of the most catchy action movie theme songs ever, courtesy of Alan Silvestri.

6. Over the Top

What can we say about Over the Top that we haven’t already said on the site or on the podcast?  It’s a movie that is beloved for it’s cheesiness and is the greatest (and only) movie about competitive arm wrestling.  There are so many classic scenes from Lincoln Hawk(s) (Stallone) driving his semi truck into his father in law’s mansion to “rescue” his son, the end tournament that features “The Office” style confessionals with such arm wrestling luminaries as Harry Bosco, Big Bill Larson, Mad Dog Madison and Bob “Bull Hurley, Lincoln revealing his in truck gym and it also has a textbook example of an 80′s soundtrack.  If you haven’t seen Over the Top yet and you love awesomely bad movies as much as we do, go watch it immediately.

5. American Ninja

An action star whose career began and ended with Cannon was Michael Dudikoff, whose greatest achievement is easily the first American Ninja movie.  Dudikoff stars as Joe, an amnesiac army grunt who was raised by a Japanese survivor of WWII, who was also a master of ninjitsu.  Joe eventually uncovers an illegal arms ring while stationed at a base in the Phillipines and must use his ninja skills to put an end to it.  Some of the more brilliantly ridiculous aspects of the movie include the main villain’s “ninja training camp”, led by the evil Black Star Ninja, Steve James as Col. Curtis Jackson (whose middle name would probably be Action if Carl Weathers hadn’t already claimed it) and the final ninja battle where the evil Black Star Ninja unveils a previously unknown ninja weapon, lasers.

4. Bloodsport

Now we get to the real gems of the Cannon catalog.  Bloodsport basically cemented Jean Claude Van Damme as the next great action hero and inspired tons of imitators, including Mortal Kombat and the aforementioned Kickboxer.  Van Damme stars as Frank Dux, an American who journeys to Hong Kong to compete in the Kumite, a deadly fighting tournament that occurs every five years, courtesy of the Society of the Black Dragon.  Dux is there to honor his recently deceased sensei and befriends fellow American Ray Jackson.  Ray is savagely beaten by the reigning Kumite champion, Chong Li and Frank vows to beat Chong Li in the tournament.  Bloodsport uses every weapon in Van Damme’s arsenal, from ridiculous kicks to splits to his ability to charmingly evade arrest.  It’s easily one of the best Van Damme movies ever.

3. Highlander

Although it’s become a mess of sequels, cartoons and a TV series, the original Highlander is still a beloved 80′s action cult classic.  Connor Macleod, born in the highlands of Scotland in the 1500′s, finds out that he’s one of the “Immortals”, a group of men who will never age and can only be killed by decapitation.  The Immortals will eventually gather for The Gathering in order to battle for The Prize.  Every time an Immortal kills another Immortal they experience The Quickening and become more powerful as they absorb their foes powers.  Connor and his mortal enemy, The Kurgan, battle in the streets of 1980′s New York City, backed by almost the entire Queen album “Some Kind of Magic”.  Christopher Lambert is amazingly bad in the movie but somehow still likeable and Clancy Brown as The Kurgan is a classic action villain and it’s modern day sword fights were probably a refreshing break from the shoot em up extravaganzas that were occuring around the same time (they’re still pretty good today).  Cap it off with Sean Connery as a Spanish Egyptian and you have a ridiculous 80′s classic.

2. Cobra

Cobra seems to be a very polarizing film in Stallone’s career.  Some people think it’s Stallone’s worst movie but here, we love it.  Stallone stars as Marion Cobretti who is part of the LAPD’s “zombie squad”, who deal with the worst of the worst crimes.  Cobra is tasked with solving a series of grisly murders that he ultimately finds out are being committed by “The Night Slasher” and his cult.  Everything about Cobra is bad ass, from his special Cobra pistols to his ever present aviator sunglasses and toothpick to his ending arguments by ripping the front of your shirt off.  Obviously the Rocky and Rambo movies are the top tier when it comes to Stallone but Cobra definitely deserves a place in the second tier.

1. Invasion USA

What is there to say about Invasion USA except that it and Commando basically inspired everything you currently enjoy on Everything Action.  I bought it sight unseen from Circuit City just based on the absolutely amazing poster art and it did not fail to be one of the most ridiculous action movies I’ve ever seen.  Chuck Norris stars as Matt Hunter, a former CIA agent who is living in the Everglades with his pet armadillo when his arch nemesis, Russian terrorist Mikhail Rostov, leads a group of mercenaries in an invasion of American soil.  Fortunately the invasion seems confined to Florida and Hunter is always there in the nick of time to drop a witty one liner and then blow the terrorist to kingdom come.  The movie really needs to be seen to be believed but here’s seven minutes of some of the best scenes, which will hopefully make you want to get the whole movie immediately.

Killer Elite marks the third Jason Statham movie that has come out this year following The Mechanic and Blitz.  Is there such a thing as too much Jason Statham?

Killer Elite is based on a book called “The Feathermen” written by former SAS soldier Ranulph Fiennes that details the SAS’s involvement in wars in Oman and other countries in the Middle East.  The movie and book, purportedly based on the true events, follows mercenary/assassin Danny Bryce (Statham) as he must come to the rescue of his mentor, Hunter (Robert De Niro), after he is kidnapped by an Oman Sheik after accepting a bogus mercenary gig.  Danny is forced to travel to London and hunt down three former SAS agents who killed the Sheik’s sons, get confessions from them and then kill them in ways that look like accidents.  Danny and his team become the target of a group of retired SAS and special forces soldiers called “The Feathermen”, who task Spike Logan (Clive Owen) to protect the men Danny is targeting.

The plot of Killer Elite takes a while to get going, especially in the beginning when it has to get through tons of exposition about the various groups and set up who is who.  One thing that doesn’t help getting a handle on things is the movie constantly jumping from country to country, going from London to Paris to Oman in what seems like a five minute span.  Once Danny and his team starts assassinating people it moves along at a good clip and the various ways they assassinate their targets is one of the highlights of the movie.  I won’t spoil them all but I will say that the one I thought was the most clever and cool involved the guys turning an oil tanker into a giant, remote controlled car and causing a traffic accident with it.

One thing that negetively affects the movie is that it seems like it’s trying to make some sort of statement about covert operations and the use of mercenaries.  Whenever action movies try to have some sort of commentary they either flat out don’t work (like, for instance, Green Zone) or it’s hilariously heavy handed (the Burmese genocide stuff in Rambo).  It’s hard to take your message seriously when Jason Statham does a flip in chair and smashes the chair into some dude’s back.  Killer Elite could have been so much better if they had spent more time on the action and less time on their convoluted message about the nature of killing and the men who do it.  I did like the fact that everyone is sort of operating in moral shades of gray.

Something that I was not expecting from Killer Elite was that it is actually a period piece, taking place in 1980.  The movie does a great job of incorpating the fashion, cars and technology of the early ’80′s but never commentating or winking at the audience about it.

Action wise, the aforementioned assassination scenes are handled really well, especially the remote control truck sequence.  One disappointing thing about the action is that the mano a mano fights between Statham and Clive Owen, while cool, are done in the handicam, close up style that has been growing increasingly annoying since showing up in the Bourne movies.  It’s not quite as bad as Michael Bay’s robot on robot fights in the Transformers movies where the camera is so close you just see random metal bits hitting other random bits but I would have appreciated the fights more if they were pulled back and you had a better sense of who was hitting who.

In terms of this year’s offerings from “The Stath” I would put Killer Elite ahead of Blitz but behind The Mechanic, just because I think that The Mechanic was a better all around action movie and didn’t get bogged down in political messages like Killer Elite does.  Statham, Clive Owen and Robert De Niro are all bad ass and fun to watch and it has some clever assassination scenes but it’s still kind of disappointing.  If you’re a serious Statham fan I would recommend you check it out during a matinee showing at your local theater but otherwise you can probably wait till it it hits DVD.

3.5 out of 5

The greatest 80′s movie about BMX racing (also the only 80′s movie about BMX racing), Rad has become a cult classic, recently getting references and parodies on shows like American Dad and Tosh.0.  One of it’s greatest features is a wonderfully cheesy 80′s sports movie soundtrack that easily ranks among others in the genre like The Karate Kid and Rocky IV.  Check out some of the songs featuring such artists as John Farnham and Real Life.

“Send Me an Angel” by Real Life (in the infamous “Bicycle Boogie” scene)

“Thunder in Your Heart” by John Farnham

“Break the Ice” by John Farnham

“Love Theme from Rad” by John Farnham

“Music That You Can Dance To” by Sparks

This week Zach, Chris and Brian talk about Chuck Norris, terrible video game movies, Contagion, tons of 80′s movie news, preview this Fall’s new TV and much more on this historic 75th episode of the Everything Actioncast.

• Show and Tell: Brian has been watching Breaking Bad, Chris watched The King of Fighters and Assault Girls and Zach watched Contagion, Ironclad, Leviathan and Forced Vengeance.
• News: Chuck Norris and Jean Claude Van Damme both confirmed for the Expendables 2, trailer for crazy Indonesian action movie “The Raid”, Top Gun getting converted to 3D, Ghostbusters coming to theaters in October, Point Break getting remade, RIP Andy “Spartacus” Whitfield and Nike actually making the Back to the Future 2 power lace shoes.  Plus, another jam packed New Release Round Up.
• Fall TV: The guys talk about what new shows they’re excited about like Person of Interest, Alcatraz and Terra Nova and what shows they’re excited to see come back like Fringe, the NBC Thursday comedies, Hawaii Five-0 and The Walking Dead.

We want to hear your comments, feedback and, most importantly, suggestions for discussion topics. Send them all to contact@everythingaction.com. Also, be sure to subscribe to us in the iTunes music store (just do a search for Everything Actioncast in the store) and follow us on twitter @evaction and on Facebook (www.facebook.com/everything.action)

Over the Top, Slyvester Stallone’s magnum opus of trucking and arm wrestling, has a textbook example of what an 80′s soundtrack should be.  There’s the mandatory Kenny Loggins power ballad, a montage song from Sammy Hagar and and a patriotic truck driving anthem from the very 80′s sounding Robin Zander.  Turn your trucker cap backwards and listen to the highlights below.

“Meet Me Halfway” by Kenny Loggins

“Winner Takes it All” by Sammy Hagar

“In This Country” by Robin Zander

I talked about it on this week’s Everything Actioncast but I recently discovered the lost 80′s classic Megaforce on Youtube last weekend and it inspired me to resurrect our Top 5 lists (although future lists won’t necessarily be 5 items) and highlight some of the best things about this vehicular spectacular.

1. The Trailer

The trailer for Megaforce is an amazing mix of hyperbole and vagueness that makes it seem like it could be describing an action movie or some sort of monster truck/motorcycle rally that will be making it’s way to your local fairground. My favorite line is probably when the announcer declares Megaforce as “the ultimate spectacle”

2. Megaforce’s insertion and raid on the enemy base

The main mission that the Megaforce has to take on in the movie is taking on a rogue general who is causing havoc on the border of two Middle Eastern nations. Megaforce leader, Ace Hunter, describes a complex plan that he says will require precise timing to drive the enemy back but in practice it devolves into dropping seemingly endless missile carrying motorcycles and dune buggies with lasers on them from a cargo plane and just blowing the absolute shit out of the enemy base. It’s actually pretty impressive the amount of explosions and vehicles that are driving around during this sequence.

3. Megaforce’s Introduction

Our first real glimpse of the technology and men of the Megaforce occurs when Commander Hunter and his squad of bikers arrives to show off their bikes firepower to a visiting British general by blowing up balloons while doing wheelies, with, of course, gratuitous slow motion. It definitely sets the tone for the ridiculousness to come and if you’re not on board, Megaforce probably isn’t a movie for you.

2. Ace Hunter himself.

A hero who could only exist in the 80′s with his ever present baby blue bandana and skintight tan jumpsuits, Ace Hunter is the devil may care leader of the Megaforce. Ladies are unable to resist him, his men love him and there’s not a building or vehicle that he can’t explode, all aspects that would help him sucessfully lead to him becoming Mayor of New York City.

1. The Flying Motorcycle

In the climactic final battle of Megaforce, the squad desperately has to reach their extraction plane while blasting their way through the enemy’s line of tanks. Hunter is knocked off his bike and is seemingly going to be left behind when he activates a recent upgrade to his motorcycle that turns it into a mini-jet. What follows is some of the most gloriously awful blue screen you will ever see and is the perfect capper to a movie that is closest the world will ever get to a live action version of the 80′s cartoon “M.A.S.K.”

We’re highlighting another 80′s classic this week on Musical Montage with The Lost Boys.  The Lost Boys is, of course, about brothers Michael and Sam, who move to the California town of Santa Clara and Michael gets caught up with a gang of vampires led by David.  The Lost Boys features a bunch of cheesily awesome 80′s music, not the least of which is the absolute pinnacle of 80′s saxophone.

“I Still Believe” by Tim Capello (you absolutely MUST click the above picture to watch the majesty of Tim Capello in action, since YouTube won’t let us embed the video)

“Cry Little Sister” by Gerard McMann

“People are Strange” by Echo and the Bunnymen

“Lost in the Shadows” by Lou Gramm

Highlander is an awesome movie for many reasons but one of the main reasons is the fantastic score by Queen.  Featuring songs like “Who Wants to Live Forever?” and a cover of “New York, New York”, the soundtrack is great but one song stands head and shoulder above the others, the opening song (and title song for the TV show) “Princes of the Universe”.  We’re featuring the music video for that song this week in Musical Montage and it’s amazing on many levels, from Queen performing on what looks like the roof set from the movie to the Highlander himself, Christopher Lambert, arriving to look intimidating and then briefly battle Freddy Mercury.  Check it all out below.

One of the film composers who defined the 80′s was synth master Harold Faltermeyer.  There is definitely no mistaking a Faltermeyer track and the second you hear one of his songs, you immediately remember what movie it’s from.  Check out some of his most memorable songs below.

“Axel F” from Beverly Hills Cop

“Top Gun Anthem” from Top Gun

“Fletch Theme” from Fletch

“Main Theme” from Tango & Cash

“Cop Out Theme” from Cop Out

“Title Music” from The Running Man

Michael Bay’s take on the Transformers has a clear technological advantage over the classic 80′s cartoon movie but one way the original handily trumps the Bayformers is with it’s amazing soundtrack, lead by Stan Bush and full of awesomely cheesy 80′s metal.  Put on your neon headbands and check out some of the best tracks from Transformers: The Movie.

“The Touch” by Stan Bush

“Dare” by Stan Bush

“Nothing’s Gonna Stand in Our Way” by Spectre General

“Instruments of Destruction” by N.R.G.

“Transformer’s Theme” by Lion

“Hunger” by Kick Axe

“Dare to be Stupid” by Weird Al

“Autobots/Decepticons Battle” by Vince Dicola (Also the composer of the Rocky IV score)

“Arrival to Earth” by Steve Jablonsky (Even though it can’t compare soundtrack wise, I’m a big fan of the score for the Michael Bay Transformers)

Today on Musical Montage, we take a look at a fantastic example of the very special genre of music videos that not only feature a song featured in or created for a movie, but the video features the stars of the movie in it as well.  This week we have the music video for “Dream Warriors” by Dokken, the theme song for Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors.  Patricia Arquette reprises her role as Kristen Parker and Robert Englund is, of course Freddy.  In this video we learn the very important fact that one of Freddy’s weaknesses is apparently awesome 80′s metal.

Our beloved and guiding light, Commando, has to grace pretty much every feature we have on Everything Action and it’s a great choice to highlight on Musical Montage as it features an extremely unique and bad ass score by James Horner and also, one of the most awesomely cheesy power ballad end credits songs in movie history.