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Real Men of Action: Rambo

By Zach

Real Men of Action

  • Name: John J. Rambo
  • Occupation: Army Special Forces (retired)
  • Family: Father- R. Rambo, Mother- Marie Dragoo
  • Enemies: Sheriff Will Teasle, Lt. Col. William Podovsky, Col. Zaysen, Kourov, Major Pa Tee Tint, Marshall Murdock
  • Allies: Col. Samuel Trautman, Co Bao (KIA), Mousa and the Mujahideen, Michael Burnett, Sarah Miller, Karen rebels, Mercenary force led by pissed off Brit Lewis
  • Weapon(s) of Choice: Bow and Arrow (with exploding tips), M60 Machine Gun, .50 Calibur Browning, survival knife
  • Body Count: 240
  • Catchphrase: “When war is in your blood, killing is as easy as breathing”

John Rambo is the definition of a “one man army”.  Born in 1947 in Bowie, Arizona, Rambo joined the Army when he was 17 and did his first tour of duty in Vietnam in 1966.  He returned a year later and started to get Special Forces training and assigned to the unit led by Col. Samuel Trautman.  Rambo conducts a number of different missions in Vietnam including assassination, espionage and sabotage.  He’s trained to ignore pain and the elements and to make weapons out of anything in his environment.  Rambo was sent back to Vietnam after his training was complete in 1969.  In ’71 he was captured and sent to a POW camp where he was tortured, Rambo escaped a year later and was sent back into Vietnam for one more tour.  During his time in Vietnam Rambo earned multiple awards including Purple Hearts, the Medal of Honor, and Silver and Gold stars.

Upon returning to the United States, Rambo has trouble returning to a normal life and is unable to hold a job for any length of time.  He starts to wander the country and ends up in Hope, Washington.  A former Army friend, Delmore Barry, lived in Hope but Rambo finds out that he died of cancer from Agent Orange.  Rambo is now the last living member of his unit.  Rambo went into town to see if he could get something to eat and maybe find a job but he is accosted by the local sheriff, Will Teasle, and eventually arrested.  The police’s horrible treatment of Rambo causes him to flashback to his time in the POW camp and he reverts back to combat mode, escaping the police station and fleeing to the woods on a motorcycle.  A manhunt begins but the police are severely outmatched by Rambo, who stalks them and sets up traps that severely injures most of the deputies.

The National Guard is eventually called in and Col. Trautman arrives as well.  Trautman warns Teasle to let him talk Rambo down or he’s “going to need a whole lot of body bags.”  The Guard eventually corners Rambo near an abandoned mine and use rocket launchers to collapse the opening, with Rambo assumed killed inside.  Rambo survives and makes his way through wet, rat filled tunnels until he finds a way to the surface.  He hijacks an Army truck and heads into Hope.  Using an M60, Rambo starts to shoot up the police station and has a cat and mouse gun fight with the Sheriff.  Rambo eventually overpowers Teasle and is about to kill him when Trautman intervenes.  Rambo breaks down and gives himself up; he’s then sent to a maximum security prison.

A few years later a situation in Vietnam requires Trautman to recruit Rambo.  There is a base in North Vietnam is suspected of containing American POWs.  Rambo is to meet up with a contact and take pictures of the base to get proof that there are not POWs.  Rambo is airdropped in but loses most of his equipment except for his knife and bow.  Rambo meets up with his contact, a woman named Co Bao, and the two head toward the base.  They arrive to find the base swarming with soldiers and there are POWs being held.  Rambo manages to rescue one and he and Co escape with him onto a boat.  The boat is attacked by a gunship but Rambo manages to blow it up with an RPG.  When they arrive at the extraction point, Murdock denies the pick up, since he is worried about what the American public would do if they found out there were still POWs in Vietnam.

Rambo is caught by the Vietnamese and sent back to the base, which it turns out is being run by Russians led by Lt. Col. Podovsky.  Rambo is tortured for information and eventually forced to call the American base.  Rambo threatens Murdock and then uses the microphone to smash one of the Russians in the face.  Co was hiding under the floor and shoots some of the other Russians, and Rambo escapes.  He promises to take Co with him to America but their relationship is cut short when Co is shot by the pursuing Vietnamese.  Rambo becomes furious and goes on a rampage back to the base, killing most of the troops and blowing up trucks and villages.  He eventually hijacks a Huey helicopter from the Soviets and flies back to the base.  Rambo kills the remaining troops and frees the POWs.  As their heading back to the American base, Podovsky pursues them in a helicopter gunship.  The Huey is hit but Rambo manages to trick Podovsky into thinking they crashed and then blows up the gunship with a missile.

Returning to the base, Rambo takes an M60 and shoots up the computer room and goes after Murdock.  Looking like he’s going to slam his knife into Murdock’s head, he instead slams it into the desk and tells Murdock to find the rest of the POWs, or he’ll find him.  Rambo then heads off into the sunset.

Three years later, Trautman again needs Rambo’s help with a situation in Afghanistan.  Rambo refuses this time and Trautman leads a group of troops to help free the civilians from Soviet control.  His group is ambushed however and Trautman is captured.  Hearing this, Rambo agrees to head into Afghanistan to free Trautman.  He’s helped by the Mujahideen and helps them win a battle against a Soviet tank group.  Rambo then heads back to Thailand where he lived for over 10 years in peace, capturing snakes and ferrying people up and down the river.

Rambo is called back into action once again when a group of missionaries he ferried into Burma are captured by the Tatmadaw, the Burmese Army.  The minister of the church has hired a group of mercenaries to free them and wants Rambo to lead them to the place where he dropped the missionaries off.  Rambo agrees and wants to go with the mercs but is denied.  The mercs head to the destroyed village the missionaries were staying at and see a group of villagers being forced to run through a mine filled rice paddy.  They hold off on intervening to not arouse attention when Rambo proceeds to kill all of the Burmese guards with his bow.  He then leads the group to the enemy camp and they manage to sneak in and rescue the prisoners undetected.

The next morning however bodies are discovered and the Burmese begin a huge manhunt into the jungle.  Rambo, missionary Sarah Miller and mercenary sniper School Boy are separated from the group and Rambo tells the other two to make for their boat.  He then leads a group of Burmese soldiers on a chase that ends with them getting blown up by a dormant warhead.

Sarah and School Boy get to the beach to find the rest of the group captured and about to be executed.  Before that can happen though, Rambo hijacks a .50 calibur Browning machine gun and begins to lay waste to the Burmese troops.  The group is also aided by the local Karen rebels.  A massive battle takes place with all the Burmese being killed, except for their leader Major Tint.  Tint attempts to escape but is disemboweled by Rambo using a homemade machete.  Rambo then finally heads back to the US, following some advice from Sarah and winds up at his father’s house.

Rambo’s current status is unknown but there is the distinct possibility that he isn’t out of action yet.

See Rambo in Action:

Rambo 4 Final CutFunny bloopers R us

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