Cabin in the Woods
Starring: Chris Hemsworth, Kristen Connolly, Anna Hutchison, Fran Kanz, Jesse Williams, Richard Jenkins
Directed by: Drew Goddard
Plot: Five friends head out to an isolated cabin for a fun weekend vacation and soon realize they’ve put themselves in the middle of something horrific.
Rotten Tomatoes Freshness: 92%
Critic Consensus: “The Cabin in the Woods is an astonishing meta-feat, capable of being funny, strange, and scary — frequently all at the same time”
The Three Stooges
Starring: Will Sasso, Sean Hayes, Chris Diamantopoulos, Jane Lynch, Sofia Vergara, Jennifer Hudson
Directed by: The Farrelly Bros.
Plot: Larry, Curly and Moe, three brothers abandoned at a convent as babies, are forced to journey out into the world for the first time to try and raise money to save their home.
RT Freshness: 50%
Critic Consensus: “While nowhere near as painful as it could have been, The Three Stooges fails to add fresh laughs to the Stooges’ inestimable cinematic legacy”
Starring: Guy Pearce, Maggie Grace, Peter Stormare, Lennie James, Vincent Regan, Joe Gilgun
Directed by: James Mather, Stephen St. Leger
Plot: The President’s daughter is trapped aboard an orbiting space prison and ex-government agent Snow is the only man who can infiltrate the prison and rescue her.
RT Freshness: 35%
Critic Consensus: “Guy Pearce does the best he can with what he’s given, but Lockout is ultimately too derivative and shallow to build on the many sci-fi thrillers it borrows from”
I’m like the J. Jonah Jameson of Everything Action, writing and editing and constantly demanding pictures of Spider-Man.