- Samurai Jack #2: Jack’s quest for the “threads of time” leads him to a village controlled by twin martial artists, Dis and Dat. In a rare defeat, Jack is unable to hold up against their perfectly timed attacks but his first thread of time reveals their secret, that Dis and Dat are tethered with a thread of time, which Jack severs and is then able to defeat them.
- Eternal Warrior #3: Gilad and his renegade daughter, Xaran, load up on weapons and head out to meet Buck, the Geomancer who speaks the will of the Earth. A rival house sends it’s forces to try and take out Gilad and Xaran, but they manage to stop them and rescue Buck, forcing him to reveal how they can meet with the Earth face to face. We also learn what Xaran was up to in the thousands of years since killing her brother during a bloody battle.
- X-O Manowar #19: With a fancy new art style, Aric of Dacia rallies his forces following the disastrous attack by both the Russian military and the Unity superhero team. A brief power struggle ensues between Aric and his rival, Volo, but Aric proves victorious and earns Volo’s respect and loyalty. Ninjak, the British ninja, manages to contact the new Unity team, who are their way to deal with Aric.
- Avengers AI #6: Vision and the evil AI Dimitrios battle in video game fashion this issue, with Vision eventually coming out on top and gaining a map of all of Dimitrios’ servers that link to the Diamond virtual reality world. Hank Pym, meanwhile, is annoyed by a strange buzzing noise that he eventually figures out is robotic teen Victor trying to communicate with him from the Diamond and the mysterious robot Alexis meets with her brother, Dimitrios.
- Fantastic Four #14: The possibility of a cure for their degenerating powers leads the Fantastic Four to an alternate timeline where Doctor Doom and Kang the Conqueror rule Earth and have defeated the Four of that world. The group barely survives the orbital defenses of Doom but Ben, sans his rocky exterior, manages to land their ship. Sue remembers that Medusa gave her a special whistle prior to them leaving, which summons the lovable and gigantic dog Lockjaw, who brings Franklyn and Val home while the adults try to figure out some way to cure themselves. Johnny takes a piece of shrapnel to the shoulder and Sue must user her powers to operate on him while he is still on fire.
- Forever Evil: Rogues Rebellion #2: Picking up during and after Forever Evil #3, the Rogues barely escape the Crime Syndicate’s Deathstorm and Power Ring, with Captain Cold losing his freezing powers and Mirror Master’s powers going wonky. The gang ends up in Metropolis with Cold meeting Lex Luthor, Bizarro and Black Manta. The other rogues have to fight off Parasite, who is after the bounty placed on the Rogues heads and Mirror Master pulls out and they end up in Poison Ivy’s garden in Gotham City.
- Indestructible Hulk #15: The Uberhulk is unleashed on the past as the Hulk gets a second dose of radiation at the site of the fateful gamma bomb test. It’s kind of confusing about what actually happens but somehow Bruce manages to regain his Hulk powers and literally punches time in the face to straighten everything out and defeating Zaarko and the Chronarchists.
- Thunderbolts #18: The Thunderbolts finish their mission for Punisher in the most hilariously anti-climactic way possible with Deadpool ending up in the pizza place that is one of the hiding places for the Paguero crime family, one they just happen to run to after escaping the slaughter at their bunker. Deadpool caps them all when he realizes who they are and goes back to eating his pizza. General Ross, meanwhile, makes a deal with Misery to only kill the invading alien forces to protect the city.
- Animal Man #25: Brother Blood continues to take over the Red while his followers hold the DC equivalent of the Oscars hostage. Buddy and his wife Ellen arrive to stop the hostage situation but they find out it’s just a front so they can sacrifice themselves on TV and show the world the power of Blood. Somehow, Buddy is transported to another planet while in the Red, Maxine and her animal friends arrive at the Mountains of Muscle to try and hide from the growing forces of Blood.
I’m like the J. Jonah Jameson of Everything Action, writing and editing and constantly demanding pictures of Spider-Man.